The Dreaded Flexi Leash

Queue Vader music…open scene…

It’s a lovely spring day in the park. A woman in a turquoise-blue sweatsuit is walking her 10 pound curly-haired boutique puppy. He’s as happy as he could be, sniffing every bush, marking everything within his 16 foot radius. His human is equally content. A cup of Starbucks in her left hand, the handle of the grey Flexi balanced delicately in the fingers of her right hand, she walks and chitters happily into her Bluetooth earpiece.

Enter scene…

From the opposite direction on the path comes Jason. A 23 year-old econ college student who loves two things in life: beer and his new Boxer puppy. Jason acquired his Boxer from a friend of a friend of a friend’s “breeding” home. (See my total loathe of puppy mills.) Mr. Boxer is also on a Flexi. One of those with the 5 pound handle? Jason is also sipping on his caramel macchiato and staring lovingly at the wagging stumpĀ of his new best pal.

You can guess what happens. Little angry dog sees giant overexcited Boxer, sniffing and circling ensues. Poor Jason is still staring at the rump. Oblivious-turquoise-sweatsuit woman, who has been extolling away her discovery of that QVC sweatsuit sale on the phone to her friend, is shocked to find she’s now in a trap. The blood to her brain being slowly cut off as the Flexi contraption has wrapped around both of their legs like a Cat’s Cradle level.

With great power comes great…you know the rest. The lesson here? Two-fold. One: when you’re out with your dog, BE with your dog. Enjoy the park, the sun, the smells, the sights. It’s nature! It’s wonderful! Two: the Flexi is great for you and your dog. It allows a greater radius of exploration without the constant threat of tripping and tangling. BUT, this requires a level of vigilance that should make you appear as a demented Cirque du Soleil performer. If I can use 4 of these bad boys at one time and keep everyone straight, anybody can do it with 1. Yeah, sure, I’m totally mental afterwards. But I like to torture myself.

Happy walking and remember, BE present, pay attention, and judiciously use both the “pull-in to short leash” and LOCK on your Flexi. Especially when moving through tight or crowded areas.


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